Just had a bomb dropped on me

E

eyeguy

New member
Today my mom calls and wants to speak to my brother and I. I asked her what it was about and she says she needs both of us together in front of her. I thought it was about my wife and sis.-in-law having an on going pissing match. I knew it was pretty serious when she offered to come to my house.



She gets here with my brother and I notice she's having a real hard time trying to tell us what's going on. My first thought was "Man, she's gonna divorce dad!!".









In a nutshell, I've got an older brother.



Imagine trying to detail a car after hearing that!!
 
Aww thats not so bad! Kinda cool actually. She was probably concerned you'd judge her for past mistakes.

Think positive about this one. Could be fun to meet a relative that you've never met. MAybe he likes to detail cars! :D
 
It's cool for sure. Sucks that I'm not the oldest now. All I know about him is that he's 36, works at NAPA, has been a DJ for about 15 years, and lives somewhere around Ashtabula, OH. He's met my uncle and was described as a good ol' boy. Sounds like my kind of brother.



I kind of wonder if my mom would've ever told us had he not located her and my uncle. Life will be interesting for a while that's for sure.
 
I know how you feel. When I was about 20, I came home from school one afternoon and their was a middle aged woman sitting in the dining room with my mom. With a quizical look on my face, my mom introduced me to her sister!



It was the first time I had ever heard of her!
 
I guess I should note he's my half-brother, but a brother none the less. I hope he doesn't meet and say, "Well that was nice, enjoy your lives." and we never see him again.



The more I think of it, I'm a little unhappy with my entire family for never telling my younger brother and I, but at the same time I can't really blame them. What really bugs me is the fact my grandma (dad's mom) told me 15 or so years ago I had an older brother that was put up for adoption. I dismissed as senility starting to set in and planned on telling my mom after she passed away. My grandma passed away a couple of weeks ago and was looking for a good time to tell her. Well, today was just as good a day as any I suppose. She's not happy to say the least.



My little brother asked mom if this was going to cut into our inheritance. He's twisted like that. I asked mom if we knew the father and she said we probably did, but she wouldn't say who he was. I guess it's none of my business really. My wife will love this when she gets back from vacation. I hope there's no more skeletons in the closet.
 
Wow!



Have you set up a meeting with your brother? I guess that'll be kinda weird at first.



Have you let you Mom know that you love her just the same and what she's done before is okay?



How's your Dad taking this? I'm sure he's known about it forever, but let your Mom take care of it.
 
When I first saw the start of this thread I was afraid that your mom had a terminal illness...so I'd classify your discovery as good news indeed :D



I think it's kinda neat that your grandmother tried to let the cat out of the bag before she passed away. She was probably risking ticking some people off, but she wanted you to know, so props to grandma.
 
Accumulator said:
When I first saw the start of this thread I was afraid that your mom had a terminal illness...so I'd classify your discovery as good news indeed :D



I think it's kinda neat that your grandmother tried to let the cat out of the bag before she passed away. She was probably risking ticking some people off, but she wanted you to know, so props to grandma.
Click to expand...





I'm glad I decided to wait until after she passed away to tell my mom. It would have definitely hit the fan. I want to see him ASAP and let him meet his real grandmother before anything happens to her. Kinda sucks my little brother and I are the only ones in the family that don't know except for the cousins. Who knows, my cousins may know and never told us. Just when you think you've got the family tree nice and trimmed another branch sprouts out of nowhere.
 
I got the same kind of news back in about 1999. Apparently, my dad had a daughter that he didn't know about. She tracked him down to let him know that she existed and was about to get married. They did the whole DNA test thing and then he broke the news to my brothers and I. Some surprise to learn I was not the oldest anymore. She must have been born just before my parents met, so she's only got a year or two on me. Unfortunately, I have a hard enought time keeping in touch with the family I've known all my life, much less adding another. She met us all for dinner a few days before Christmas, that year, and has sent a card or two since, but I've pretty much lost all touch.
 
I hope we don't get out of touch. If he turns out to be a horses rear I'd still like to stay in touch but maybe like cousins stay in touch if that makes sense. I'd like to know the circumstances involving his coming to be and exactly why mom couldn't or wouldn't keep him. I get the feeling the whole family tried to find a way to keep him, but it couldn't work out.



I found out my aunt wants to meet him before my mom and I'm trying sink that idea without causing a big riff in the family. My cousin's also pissed that nobody told him. Now if this guy's two brothers didn't know, how can he be mad? Like he had a right to know before my brother and I!
 
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