funny story and a ?: how discern a PRO detailer?

chris0626

New member
So ... having the white Jag in pretty good shape, I'm just beginning to work on the red one, which was sorely neglected by the P.O. and even by me :o since buying it in Nov. So last night I'm out there curbside til about midnight, beginning with the sad vinyl roof.



Around 10pm, this car drives by, and a guy in the front seat says, "Hey, I can make that car look FINE!" He gets out, rubs his finger across the very dirty/oxidized paint (my suspicion begins to be aroused), to show me how dirty it is. (Well, DUH! Whydaya think I'm out here in the middle of the night trying to clean it?)



He goes on to tell me he's worked (til recently) for a local detail shop. So I start playing with him.



Me: "So what kind of tools are you proficient with?"

Him: (chest bulging proudly) "Oh, all of 'em!"

Me: "What will you do about all the oxidation?"

Him: (Now swelling with pride) "Oh, the best: Turtle Wax."

Me: "You ever use Zaino, Klasse, Pinnacle, stuff like that?"

Him: [blank stare]



OK. So I already figure this guy knows about as much about detailing as my cat does. So ... I gave him a little challenge -- said: "Tomorrow, I'll bring the white Jag up here. If you guarantee me you can make this one look as good as that one, you got yourself a deal. "



OK. I fear I'm just being cruel. But it sorta ticks me off that he's trying to pass himself off as a pro.



I'm thinking the "or else" of the challenge might be that if a neutral party says his work doesn't look as good as mine, then I owe him nothing. But is that really lousy/unfair of me?



Also, is there a chance that he could really do damage to the sad red Jag?



All sage counsel appreciated.
 
Once he put Turtle Wax in a class of "the best" I would make certain he never laid a hand on my car! Nuff said. Just as you suspect, he may end up doing more damage than good.:argue
 
I'll personally go up to Missouri if you do not let this guy touch the red jag (<$200 bus ticket with military discount.) Rubbing his dirty fingers on the paint!!!!!!!!!!! Pardon my language but WTF! Linear scratches. Never, ever, ever rub your fingers on a dirty car. NEVER!



This really pushes my buttons. Should of went thank you have a nice day. Move along please. Nothing to see here.



Well DUH! Dirty paint = dirt on fingers. A bit to obvious.



If I was there......

Maybe wash the Jag stand back and inspect the paint for damage. Maybe even break out a 10X-30X lighted magnifier.



You: What products and equipment do you use?

Him: The Best, Turtle Wax.

Me: Hmmm Turtle Wax good selection....if you were still a little kid trying to make $5 around the neighboorhood trying to sell you're services.

Him: So what do you use?

Me: What Lynn is thinking about right now (Klasse, Zaino, Pinnacle, 3M, Meguiar's pro, Porter Cable, Makita (still gotta learn to use the thing, lol what did you think, its a family show (I am not going to sock a guy in the face for trying to be helpful if not a bit thick headed.))



anyway end or rant/



Until late working at a detail shop, maybe he was fired......
 
IMHO, any jacka$$ who uses Turtlewax for oxidation should be strapped to an electric chair and fried if they attempt to come near me car!!! Set the guy on fire or something.



If the sad red jag is bad, I'd say keep the damage minimal by keeping him far and away from your car.



Please keep in mind two things when listening to my opinion:



1) i am not anything close to sage..... (just check out my post about Powertone. :D ) LMAO



2) I only have a Focus but am quite protective about it. If I had your jaguar or ANY jaguar, I'll turn into a Mother Hen on drugs.
 
Lyn, funny story. Hey he came up to you asking so no problem for playing with him. Knowing what you do it probably doesn't make sense to have him give your car a nice turtle wax shine. I do however think that you should invite him to see your white jag, and explain to him in a nice way that you are not a pro and this is the type of detail you can do and explain to him that he needs to learn more about detailing before working on expensive cars, what if he uses the TW compounding paste. Send him our way we can reprogram him and open his eyes to a new world that goes beyond the detail shelfs of his local drug store.
 
I'm lovin' this. Knew it would give you Real Professionals lots of opportunities for a good clean rant! :D



BTW, I do know he does not know a thing about Real Detailing. I guess I was just sufficiently tired and sufficiently appalled at his obvious ignorance, that I thought it might be funny to watch him work a couple of hours and prove to him that he is clueless. ThomasFL, you're probably right. But I doubt the guy has a phone and TV, much less a PC with Internet access.



Keep em comin', mates!
 
Most professional Detailers (besides autopians detailers) don't use Klasse, Zaino, or Pinnacle and probably don't have a clue what they are. Pinnacle is pretty expensive, Klasse and Zaino take to long to work with to get the results you want. A glaze and a coat of a carnauba wax will get them the desired results without having to apply multiple coats of Zaino or Klasse.
 
Perhaps the "I can make that car look fine" line is his way of saying "Whats your sign?"

It's just pitiful what some of us will do/say.

Sage advice.....The guy needs supervision.
 
thats a cracker of a story Lynn but heres what id do, if i were you.



I go so he can detail your red jag, BUT id bring along everything you need to do a detail with.



Ask him again how he is going to do your car.



If he says turtle wax again. grab him under your wing and say "now you dont seriously want me to thing you are a professional if you use a product like that do you" then let him know you are a pro as well.



Then id ask if he really wants to know how to detail, and go about teaching him the autopia way. It may be a fun day.



If he gets unreceptive just leave.



But i surely cant hurt passing on your knowledge, it will help him but cost you basically nothing but time.



Just my suggestion.
 
kempie said:
Perhaps the "I can make that car look fine" line is his way of saying "Whats your sign?"

It's just pitiful what some of us will do/say.

Sage advice.....The guy needs supervision.

:rofl Kempie!



Well .... sad news. He didn't show today. Ya reckon it was because of the way I was snickering last night with him? (Honest! I tried to control myself!!)



Most professional Detailers (besides autopians detailers) don't use Klasse, Zaino, or Pinnacle and probably don't have a clue what they are. Pinnacle is pretty expensive, Klasse and Zaino take to long to work with to get the results you want. A glaze and a coat of a carnauba wax will get them the desired results without having to apply multiple coats of Zaino or Klasse

Really???? Well then I'm rather disappointed. The zaino I use (and, no doubt, other polymer sealants) makes subsequent washings a snap! And I continue to disagree with folks who say Z is time consuming. I apply it over the whole car, and by the time I'm finished, I can safely/easily start buffing it off. Why would an Autopian detailer go with the "placebo" of a wax when the long-term cure of a polymer sealant is (isn't it????) so much more durable? Is this just a "survival" issue for you guys?? BTW, Intel & others: I trust you know I'm not trying to raise a riot with that question.
 
Lynn... Thanks for the laugh! here's one I want to share....



Last week, I was detailing a 2003 Grand Cherokee Limited for one of my long time clients. This really filthy and oxidized Camaro driven by a what appeared to be a high school kid pulls into my driveway...



"Excuse me, sir, but you are doing that all wrong...."



"Doing what wrong?"



"Buffing that Jeep"



The Jeep was 5 months old, no scratches, one small bird bomb stain on the hood. I had already washed, clayed and rewashed the Jeep, and I was polishing it with my PC using Meguiar's #3 to prep it for Liquid Glass with an S100 topper.



"What am I doing wrong"



"You can't use one of those "cheap wal mart polishers" to clean your paint...you need to use a rotary buffer with a wool pad and a heavy compound to get the crap out of the paint"



"What should I use when I am done with compounding?"



"Rain Dance is good, so is Simonize and Rain X wax...I'll tell you what... I work for a detail shop, but you can't get the stuf that we use on cars...they only sell to "pros"..."



"Really? Who do you work for?"



"XYZ's auto detailing in *******... I am still in high school, I work there on weekends and during the summer"



"What would you charge for a complete in and out detailing?"



"We get $195, more if it is an SUV..."





My son's Mustang, which I had detailed with him the day before was in the other bay of my garage...the door was closed so he could not see it.



I opened the door to reveal the 2001 Mustang shining in all of it's glory....



"Wow! YOU did that?"



"Yes, I did"



"What did you use?"



I then told him my process, washing, claying, tar removal, color sanding a scratch acquired during the winter, products used, etc. (including my "cheap polisher" :D )



The kid looked at me like I had three heads and then asked me to show him my "detailing arsenal" of equipment and products. It was time for a short break, so I offered him a cup of joe and gave him the 50 cent tour.



Iasked him if he had any questions.....



"I am looking for a new job...wanna hire me and teach me to do things the right way?"



I respectfully declined, explaining that I do it on a limited basis as a part time endeavor. I did refer him to Autopia, to learn the "true path to automotive detailing enlightenment!"



There may be hope for the young lad yet!
 
ROFLMAO Lynn! Great story!



I've been unable to get on Autopia lately (due to working 15 hour days at our Indy office and lack of sleep), but I always enjoy reading your stories! :rofl
 
Originally posted by Lynn

Really???? Well then I'm rather disappointed. The zaino I use (and, no doubt, other polymer sealants) makes subsequent washings a snap! And I continue to disagree with folks who say Z is time consuming. I apply it over the whole car, and by the time I'm finished, I can safely/easily start buffing it off. Why would an Autopian detailer go with the "placebo" of a wax when the long-term cure of a polymer sealant is (isn't it????) so much more durable? Is this just a "survival" issue for you guys?? BTW, Intel & others: I trust you know I'm not trying to raise a riot with that question.



It depends on my customer and how often they get their cars detailed/waxed as to what specific products I will use. I have a few customers who want their cars waxed every single month. They don't want to pay for a polymer, they just want the deepest and wettest shine I can give them, so a good glaze and S100 works best for them. Others get their cars waxed once a year or less, and I use a polymer sealant on their cars.



As far as Zainos goes, it seems once you get past the initial swirl/scratch removal and all the Dawn washings, it is probably very easy to use. Final Polish is far less finicky to use the first time, so I'll be sticking with that as my Polymer/synthetic wax choice. However, if a customer wants to purchase the Zaino system and pay me for my time to apply it the first time, no problem. ;)
 
JasonC8301 said:
Pardon my language but WTF!



Heh heh, note that Uncle Sam's Misguided Children are expanding Jason's vocabulary.





:D :cool: Sorry, Jason, j/k, I just couldn't resist. And I REALLY liked your "..move along please, nothing to see here..."! :xyxthumbs
 
Intel486 said:
Most professional Detailers (besides autopians detailers) don't use Klasse, Zaino, or Pinnacle and probably don't have a clue what they are. Pinnacle is pretty expensive, Klasse and Zaino take to long to work with to get the results you want. A glaze and a coat of a carnauba wax will get them the desired results without having to apply multiple coats of Zaino or Klasse.



Agree 100%!
 
Thats a pretty funny story.



I think this guy was more after you then the car. In his eyes, he was thinking.... hmmmmm one day i detail her car.... next day i detail her. (thats the way guys think, and who ever disagrees is lying)

By you knowing about detailing blew his cover and he would never show up.



I remember one time when Jason found a bag of old detailing supplies I had and he found Turtle wax. I never seen him laugh so hard. I think he took a pic of it as well.

NYD
 
NY detailer said:




I think this guy was more after you then the car. In his eyes, he was thinking.... hmmmmm one day i detail her car.... next day i detail her. (thats the way guys think, and who ever disagrees is lying)



Yeah, when I first started detailing for the guy that owns the topless bars, he didn't have his warehouse, so I detailed them at Fantasy Ranch. Occasionally, I detailed some of the dancer's cars. Lots of $1's to count! At first, I thought this would be an easy way to meet a 'sure thing' until I got a look at some of them in the daylight. No wonder those clubs are dark and they encourage alcohol consumption!



I know what you mean about female customers, there are a few I wouldn't mind dating, but I'm afraid of what effect that could have on my business if I start hitting on some of my female clients. Most of the really cute ones are married anyway. :(
 
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